Monday morning quarterbacking

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Well as you everyone knows my Ravens won and everyone has them back in the Super Bowl. LSU and Bama dominated and it looks like the National Championship is set. This weeks topic is Stevie Johnson’s TD celebration. After scoring on the Island he preceded to start a a celebration dance then made a gun with his fingers and shot himself in the leg and hobbled around. The ran around with his arms outstretched and fell down.

Now everyone is mad at Stevie for doing his celebration. Saying it’s disrespectful to Plax? Get the fuck outta here. He shot himself in the leg!! It really happened and he went to jail for having a concealed weapon. It’s not Stevie’s fault Plax is an idiot. When you do something so stupid, fuck you, you deserve to be made fun of. It’s like the NFL wants to avoid having their fans reminded that their employees are stupid criminals. Then what really got me is one of the Jets players actually said the whole Jet crashing thing is disrespectful cause of 9/11? Like really? Do you know the name of the team you play for? I guess it’s also disrespectful to NYC when ya’ll crash and burn every season.

I want to start a fund to pay the fines of any players who do the following touchdown celebrations*:

1. [while playing the Eagles] form a dog fighting pit in the endzone, have two lineman spar, kill loser

2. [while playing the Steelers] sexually assault a cheerleader in the bathroom.

*mock celebrations (I’m not advocating raping or killing anyone fucker)

Why I hate the iPad

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Last night as I’m watching “Adult Swim,” and lamenting on the lack of original [good] cartoons they show (remember “Sea Lab 2021,” and “The Oblongs”?), I see a commercial for the iPad. As I’m watching this commercial I’m thinking, “what kind of idiot would buy an iPad to do the things they show on this commercial?” So today I go online to find said commercial. After a quick Google/YouTube search doesn’t produce it, I go to the source. And the great Apple can’t recognise QuickTime on my computer… nice.

Ok an hour later after finding out i have to pay host embedded videos on here (pay hell no!!! 000webhost.com is free!!), I can show you the offending commercial. Ok maybe not they won’t let me embed videos not hosted here either. Bastards… I guess I’ll just put the youtube links up here:

Ok this starts off with a little-league basketball coach using his iPad to draw up plays in what looks to be a timeout situation. I for one am not gonna be using a $500 electronic device when a simple $5 dry-erase board will suffice. If I drop the dry-erase board I’m not punching one of the kids cause I’m pissed off I just dropped my $500 iPad coaching little league basketball; that I ain’t even getting paid for. It then goes to a person using the iPad for guitar effects. This was the thing that really blew me. Ok I’m supposed to believe that I can seriously use this, what; in place of a pedal? When one good pedal will cost damn near the price of one of these things. You think that shit sounds any good on an iPad? See what software pedals/racks run you from ProTools. The third shot is a man using the iPad to see a 3d model to make a clay model car off. Again not very plausible.

This next one I found while looking for the first. What struck me was the fact that the user was watching TED seminars on the iPad. If you are not aware what a TED seminar is, here is a pretty good description. The bottom line is the iPad is marketed as this amasing that does everything… awesomely. But in reality does most of those things sup-par. Most smartphones are almost as capable and laptops are vastly superior. Tablets in general are dumb… but the claims Apple expects us to believe in it’s commercials are just ridiculous. If they were still updating stuffwhitepeoplelike.com I’m sure the iPad would be on there.

Under-rated MC’s

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Every Tuesday instead of bitch about the mainstream shit that’s just been released, I’m gonna highlight an under-rated MC. The first week is gonna be a MC who’s been a personal favourite of mine for quite some time; Hell Razah aka Heaven Razah. “Razah Reborn” is the first proper release of new material since he suffered a brain hemorrhage in April 2010. Nothing on the album is mind-blowing, but it is another solid release. Several track that he doesn’t actually appear on are puzzling… but then again that’s something you can expect from any Wu/Wu-affiliate. Beats ain’t crazy… but the production is precise, on point, and very impressive. Overall it’s a dope hip-hop album that you can sit back n chill to that ain’t on some r&b’y shit.

Heaven Razah’s “Razah Reborn album can be found here:

Other albums that come highly highly recommended by me under the name Hell Razah include “Renaissance Child” and Sunz of Man Presents: “Hell Razah and 4th Disciple: Freedom of Speech.”

Monday morning (evening) QB’ing

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LSU, Alabama, Arkansas… need I say more about college football? Actually I will. Now I agree with everyone that there should be a playoff system in the BCS. But a part of me doesn’t; and after last Friday night a big part of me doesn’t. Most people probably did not watch the Friday evening match-up against [formerly] #2 ranked Oklahoma State against Iowa State. I saw the match-up and turned “Superbad” on. After one of the greatest comedies of the past decade ended I had the game on but wasn’t paying much attention to it. I noticed that OkSt. wasn’t dominating as the were the previous week. In fact, it was a ball game. Watching Iowa State defeat Oklahoma State in double overtime was exciting.

What made it exciting is the fact that they knocked OkSt. out of the BCS hunt. If there was a playoff system this game would not have mattered; OkSt. would still make they playoffs and still have a chance to be champions. It reminded me of the 2007 season as the Big East BCS contenders knocked each other out in round robin fashion. But after each win the winning team was on track to possibly play for a national title. They made for a few consecutive weeks of magical Thursday nights. Most people who don’t follow college football that close really don’t care about that. They just want the excitement at the end, which I can understand; as that’s how I feel about the NBA (if I watch it at all). But for the die-hard fans who want a playoff how quickly do they remember a chilly November evening that changes the whole season.

Now to the big boys. The Ravens defeated the Bengals 31-24 yesterday. It was a divisional game versus a team that Joe Flacco has always struggled against. All in all it was a good effort.

Now let’s hear from general manager Atkins of the Baltimore Ravens. Ray Rice is not a power back, what are we paying Anthony Allen for? Torrey Smith is gonna be a star. We need to focus in the next draft on finding a linebacker to replace Ray Lewis. We have talent, but not elite; not even very good talent. Same with the free safety position. Jimmy Smith looked good getting his first significant playing time of the season, even though he got beat deep; bad. Next up as I’m falling into a Turkey coma will be the San Francisco 49er’s; a better version of the Bengals. It will be a good game and exciting to watch my team on Thanksgiving.

Oh yeah, Maryland lost to Iona this weekend. Um?????? They’re 2-2 now. Hopefully they’re competitive this year. In a couple years they’re going to be a force.

 

 

Welcome

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To anyone who happens to be reading this; I’m sorry. It’s my goal to waste at least five minutes of your time. Hopefully one day I’ll be wasting five minutes of your life everyday. I guess I should introduce myself. My name is Nick Atkins. I’m a 28 year-old un-employed electrician. Been in jail a year (fuck Google, case search me). Just got out not a month ago. I love good music. Mostly hip-hop and r&b that ain’t on the radio. Love football, love the Terps and SEC football (hate Florida). I’m kind of a tech geek, amateur android hacker. Former professional cyclist (I got paid an appearance fee it counts!!). Un-like the prison you don’t usually come home from jail ripped. I came home in terrible shape. I’m trying to get back into riding [maybe racing at some point] bikes again.

So that’s what this blog is mostly gonna be about: music, technology,  and sports. Probably politics too, maybe fashion, um pretty much don’t be surprised to see anything. Disagreeing and arguing is highly encouraged.

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